Changing my ways

I used to bang my knuckles bloody, trying to change someone. Pounding on that ever so inviting front door, as they peeked out from behind the curtain in the window. Seemingly having forgotten that they sent me an invite. Surely they wouldn’t just leave me out in the rain. Confused by their mixed signals of wanting me in their life, yet not allowing the space for it to happen.

I would take it deeply personal. Finding fault with myself for not being allowed in, even though I was asked to come. I would accomplish inhumanly feats of magic, trying to work my way through that locked door. Without success. There was no change in their behavior no matter what I did on my part. Then it finally dawned on me. The invite was not for me, it was for them. For their narcissistic needs to be met. I was just one more who fell for the lure.

I have learned that not everything that beckons you, deserves to be paid attention to. Let them hoot and holler all they want. It’s for them to make a change within themselves, if so desired. It’s not for me to point out the infinitesimal world they live in when all they have to do is throw open that door to let life and love happen.