In due time

It’s been more than a couple of years since I had a lover. I’m not in a rush to get another. It took me the first couple of years to re-assemble every belief and every illusion that was shattered to a million pieces after that experience. It was quite ironic that it took someone to pierce me so deeply, bleeding me out with every un-coming of myself, to cause me to rise to that beauty inside that had laid dormant all my life.

So I’m not in a rush to get another lover. Not because I’m afraid. Or hardened. Quite contrary, the experience has left me as soft as I have ever been in my entire life. I dare say my entire lifetimes. No, I have nothing to fear. Everything I held true was exposed to its stark naked lie. And it took that for me to come to life. Once you realize all the things you have held onto, things that have neither value nor meaning in regards to your eternal life, you are free to go about any way you please. Life becomes so much better when you leave behind all the things you can do without.

So I’m not in a rush to get another lover. I have eternity to figure it all out. I am still absorbing all the lessons that came with allowing myself to be held in someone’s arms who had no care to know my Soul. But that was the beauty of the entire experience. Being held by someone who didn’t care to know what he was holding totally forced me to figure it out on my own. Never mind that he himself did not care to even know his own. Soul that is.

So I’m not in a rush to get another lover. There is so much in life that is inviting me to open myself up to experience, that I don’t need a lover. In due time, I will want another lover. And this lover will know me inside out. This lover will know me by (my) vibration before he will see me by sight. This lover will recognize his own Soul, when he hears me calling out.