The curing of modern day calamities

I have had this terrible affliction with attachment all my life. To this day it remains a prominent feature. So instead of shunning it, running from it and trying to avoid it ( impossible people, who do you think I am, some guru in the mountains of Nepal?), I am learning to live with it. Yes, good Lawd, it is not a physical disease, but it has handicapped me my entire life. So what else to do but to make the best of it.

I claim to be a non-materialistic person. And in comparison to what and who I am surrounded by, I truly am not materialistic. So between all the events in my life that have pushed and forced me, and to this day still do, to let go of anything that is a thing, I have learned to just get over it. No use crying over spilled milk, even though I still catch myself having a moment of “ Noooo! I can’t believe it’s gone”, depending on what it is. That one was rather easy to learn to live with.

Here’s my ass-kicker though. People. Yes, as much as I am an introvert, and as much as I am happy by myself and don’t need company to have a beautiful day. That’s just how gravely I become attached to people who come into my life for reasons unknown to me, yet have and do serve a greater purpose than I ever know. How do you let go of the “neediness” of wanting someone to want to be part of your life as much as you want them in your life?

Yes, I know, that sounds a bit confusing, so let’s read it one more time…How do you let go of the “neediness” of wanting someone to want to be part of your life as much as you want them in your life. And wanting to be in their life. I honestly don’t know. I have yet to master that and overcome that abysmal need of someone reciprocating my want for them in my life.

This is not just about romantic relations. This is about anyone that you want in your life, but much more, that you want them to want to be a part of your life. Family, friends, that sort of thing. I am sure there’s plenty of you out there, who had to get over the fact that specific people in your life really show no interest nor effort to be part of your life. I mean on the equivalent level that you would be a part of their life if they allowed it. They have other priorities than you and don’t hesitate to show that in their (inter) actions with you.

This is how I am learning to live with it. I do remain committed to the people I want in my life. But I am more committed to allowing those people in my life who want to be in it. Their want of wanting to be in my life is slowly overtaking my want to want people in my life who do not want to be part of it.

So for this new year, I wish for all of you to learn to live with your own terrible afflictions, whatever they may be.