Call of Duty or Word Play

It has been inspection week at my place of employment. The entire place has been getting ready for it for the last few weeks. Which means additional demands have been placed on everyone working there. It’s not that big of a deal if you look at it from the standpoint that you would want the place to continue to operate under full capacity, allowing you to continue making a living. Nevertheless, it’s been a bit taxing for everyone.

Yesterday a co-worker asked something of me, I honestly can’t even remember what he “needed”, and I obviously must have made one of my flippant remarks. His comeback was :” You don’t like to be needed, do you?”

The answer to that is: No.

No, I don’t like to be needed. The full definition of need is actually this: necessary duty- obligation

So no, I do not like the sense of someone “making me” feel obligated. To them or to an act. I am a loyal person, which is someone who has a feeling of strong support for someone or something. I am committed to being supportive of you, NOT doing it for you. There is only one person who can fulfill your life the way it was intended, and that person is you. That obligation should not be put off onto someone else.

There is quite a significant difference in that.

People think that you can separate out need and want in regards to a relationship, when in essence it boils down to the same thing. Want is to be needy or destitute. To lack something one desires. So either need or want is the equivalent of lack. There is something lacking in order for you to need or want something or someone.

And that’s why I do not like to be needed. Or really, now that I am writing on this matter, to be wanted either. We are learning something here together, isn’t that a beautiful thing.

If anything, I prefer to be an addition. The act or process of adding or uniting. The result of adding is increase.

That is the determining difference to me now. The reciprocal addition of what can I bring to your life and what can you bring to mine that increases the well being of both of us. Not coming from a “ lack of” and the need to fill something you yourself are responsible for.