True colors, legacies and other trivial matters

Heike Kelley
Jul 9, 2016
2 min read

I'm a white girl. Living in the south [of the US] ever since I have been here. I'm actually German but as a wise [ass] told me many years ago after I first got here: What's the difference, all they gonna see is white.

From day one I was pretty much made aware not to fu*k with the police. Mainly because every single one of my children is "of color". Not white. So I have actually had the privilege of people spewing racial epitaphs in front of me with great ease. Being comfortable to share what they really think. Because I am a white girl. People also felt very comfortable sharing their homophobic thoughts with me on the assumption that I am heterosexual. You wouldn't know my sexual orientation unless we were intimate with one another, so that's a lot of assuming on people's behalfs. Any of those people sharing their fear and hate driven thoughts with me never once considered the fact that pretty much every single person I have loved, love, care for, mattered and matters to me and has had significant influence in my life were all people labeled into a minority category. Labels of color, religion, sexual orientation etc.

They see the "white girl" and go no further than that. Now, over the years, some of that behavior has decreased. For the simple fact that there are many more people loving and sharing their lifes with people of any so-called minority categories. Be it a white guy married to a woman with a different ethnicity. Be it the parent of a non-heterosexual child [ too many categories to even list here], or people being friends despite having completely different religious beliefs. All that resulting in some changes of the law and policies instituted in the work force.

It has taken for people to be killed in cold blood, harassed, physically tortured, driven to suicide to have those small changes implemented. Here's my thought on this: no matter what you believe, you will die one day. Even if you don't believe in anything, you will die. So what is it that you are actually fighting over?

There is nothing here in this life that should have you act out in irrational fear and hate to ever harm any creature or human. You can not make your life better by making others lifes worse. I've said it before: the only things you will take with you are the consequences of your actions. What kind of legacy do you want to leave behind?

Image: van on I 95 on my road trip